The Half Man Half Biscuit Lyrics Project

Busking this at Embankment Tube tomorrow

179 pop songs picked over by pedants

A Haliborange overdose is perhaps not the right way

Sealclubbing lifts the title and the bit at the end from the poptastic David Essex’s 1982 Me And My Girl (Night-Clubbing). Of course in this day and age the term makes more headlines for (not) being an iPhone app. Thanks to Martin, Nigel and Sarah

See lyrics to Sealclubbing

14 Letters Sent:
  1. 1

    Two Fat Feet

    ‘me pension’ rather than ‘my pension?’

  2. Ah, now we get into trying to spell an interviewee’s laugh. I’m never sure what the policy should be here, and I certainly won’t claim the site is consistent on this topic. OK… ‘me’ it is.

  3. 3

    Colin

    Not a comment or correction but an observation: the line “you can lead a horse to water but a pencil must be lead mate” comes from a classic Laurel and Hardy episode. But which one?

  4. 4

    Ricardo

    Brats. Notable for being one of only two Laurel and Hardy films without any other actors, this is the only version I could find online. It’s one of those colour restoration jobs – and from about two minutes in, the picture freezes, so the sound runs about thirty seconds ahead of the action for the rest of the film. Anyway, Stan Laurel can be heard speaking the relevant line from about 7.20 in.

    Another quote the line always reminds me of is one of Dorothy Parker’s:

    “You can lead a horse to water
    But you can’t make him drink.
    You can lead a horticulture
    But you can’t make her think.”

  5. 5

    Third rate Les

    I think it’s “sir”, written without a capital.

  6. 6

    Two Fat Feet

    Now that’s just being picky, Les.

  7. 7

    Third rate Les

    Thank you!

  8. 8

    Mr Larrington

    I’d always heard it as “do you be indigestion”, but then I’m a cloth-eared git.

  9. 9

    Poolio

    I’ve always heard / sung it as:

    That’s the third biro that you’ve broken all day, I can not wait…

    And (final line)

    Oh paradise…

  10. 10

    Matt Lee

    It’s “That’s the third biro that you’ve broke and all day I cannot wait”

  11. 11

    Mr Galbraith

    The last line – possibly ‘me and my girl – ooh paradise’? Combination of muddy production and my age-related mutton-ness could well make me wrong…

  12. 12

    dagenham dave

    I agree with Mr Galbraith regarding the ‘ooh paradise’ line

  13. 13

    Chief Exec

    That’s the third biro that you’ve broken; all day I can not wait

    In my opinion.

  14. 14

    dave trebble

    Is the last line not “in paradise”

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