Latest: Reports from the Bilston gig and news of gigs in Oxford and Leeds

I Love You Because (You Look Like Jim Reeves)

My girlfriend looks like Peggy Mount
What am I supposed to do?
I’m up the creek and never mind the paddle boy
I haven’t even got a canoe

I sold my soul to an Arctic Roll
I went to hell on a red skidoo
I did the Shake’n'Vac and broke my fucking back
And now my library books are nine weeks overdue

Knock, knock
Who’s there?
The patron saint of Llandudno
The patron saint of Llandudno who?
Tony Bastable

You scratch my back and I’ll scratch yours
And I’ll be in heaven before you

I love you because you look like Jim Reeves

Comments and corrections?

Here comes The Black Horse...

Your PBRs
Because life is a Perpetual Biscuit Reference
HMHB Lyrics in the Media
Acknowledge those brave souls who slip one in
Gig Reviews and Discussions
Including Pre-Gig Banter and the Giant Set List Chart
The Lux Familiar Cup 2011
The Nation chooses its favourite HMHB song
No Longer In Need Of Season Tickets
The "curse of HMHB" victims and how long they outlived a mention
See what we've got in the pipeline
We get to work on some songs not yet released
Lists of stuff in HMHB songs
...from musicians to footballers to dates...
Shit Band, No Fans
The football chants sneaked into the songs
Kill, kill, kill, stab murder and dispatch
"but most people still just seem to quote the jokes"
Thirty seconds into the first song...
Discuss the best opening lines in the songbook
This sounds like a class rant
The politics of Half Man Half Biscuit
25th Anniversary Chat
Celebrity readers queued up to pay tribute
Cover Versions
Discussing the Trad. Arr. Tunes heard live
Bicciepedia
The real stories behind the songs. Possibly.
It might sound bogus – but it’s official
Exxo gets an audience with NB57