The Half Man Half Biscuit Lyrics Project » Saucy Haulage Ballads

We’ve had Cant conformism since 1966

Chris The Siteowner — Sat, 02 May 2009 07:59:54 +0000

I always thought it would be a little bit perverse to sneak in On Finding The Studio Banjo before a certain other song. So I did.

See lyrics to On Finding The Studio Banjo

They think they’re Benny Goodman

Chris The Siteowner — Wed, 29 Apr 2009 17:19:41 +0000

It Makes The Room Look Bigger is another one of those songs which sound fairly straightforward to transcribe, but four people sent in these lyrics and I ended up using bits from each version. A Nigel writes: “There’s always potential to find an obscure way to make [a song] a personal favourite; in this case, the lament about the lack of key fobs with the name Nigel, whether in the souvenir stall at your footy club or your favourite Welsh castle. Many of us have had this problem, despite it being one of the most popular names of mid-1963…” (but not as popular as Chris was – Ed). Thanks to EskimoEric, Paul, Charles and Neil G.

See lyrics to It Makes The Room Look Bigger

Snide rosettes outside the ground

Chris The Siteowner — Tue, 24 Mar 2009 17:44:36 +0000

Jarg Armani might be a bit of a thrash, but it hides illicit vanloads of subtlety, including religious imagery, footy and some real Scouse stuff. And it may well have put the final nail in NTL’s coffin. According to my correspondent, the word ‘Jarg’ is used in Liverpool and Birkenhead as a precise synonym of ‘fake’: fake designer goods, fake footy tops, fake tickets, even fake people. ‘Snide’ is similar but even more negative with its implications of disloyalty and betrayal. I’ve noticed on Merseyside footy sites that ‘jarg’ recently became one of those ‘look at me I talk more Scouse than you’ words used to establish that you’re part of the in-crowd, and its use has at least quintupled in about the last five years. See, this site is educational too. Thanks to Charles Exford, EskimoEric and Neil

See lyrics to Jarg Armani

I half expected a nymph to appear

Chris The Siteowner — Sat, 01 Nov 2008 09:23:10 +0000

What a great concept (“a true story” claims Nigel, live) – a bloke sharing his innermost thoughts with a bloke called Edward instead of his “sweet darling”. Tending The Wrong Grave For 23 Years is a wonderful song, although I suspect there might be one or two discussions around some of the minutiae on this one. Thanks to Eskimo Eric, Joe, gNick, Paul and Neil.

See lyrics to Tending The Wrong Grave For 23 Years

Can you hear Talvin Singh?

Chris The Siteowner — Fri, 28 Mar 2008 23:38:24 +0000

Blood on the Quad sounds like a class rant but it’s really not apparently. A great two-minute thrash which I’m sure would go down well at a Cambridge May Ball. Half Man Half Biscuit played one of them once, by the way. I haven’t seen that documented widely, but I do have a mate who claims to have been there.

See lyrics to Blood on the Quad
(I need some opinions on the fourth line)

So you’re Brad Friedel – I’m mildly impressed

Chris The Siteowner — Fri, 07 Dec 2007 12:05:29 +0000

Let’s face it, who amongst us haven’t been to a wedding reception (evening only, of course) and not thought: “I wish the DJ would put on some Thomas Tallis”? It’s this age-old longing which so clearly inspired I Went To A Wedding…, the highlight of the six-track Saucy Haulage Ballads EP from 2003. That and the chance to tack on another football chant with words that are rather too obscure to be a real chant.

See lyrics of I Went To A Wedding…