20 Oct 2008
Two Scotch eggs and a jar of Marmite
As it’s the hundredth song on the site, of course we ought to do a commensurately high profile one. So here’s the original album version of Twenty Four Hour Garage People from 2000, since which there have been almost as many versions as live performances. My, how the price of Pringles has varied over the years. Thanks to Martin, Paul, gNick, Jon, Sarah and everyone who knows me.
See lyrics to Twenty Four Hour Garage People
16 Letters Sent:
Richard
The particular Leadbelly song the irate assistant starts to sound like is Rock Island Line – also covered by Lonnie Donegan.
May 15th, 2009
Daryl
In addition to Richard’s comment, the final two lines of the song allude to Leadbelly’s Where Did You Sleep Last Night?
May 16th, 2009
Charles Exford
I wonder (again) if we need a gigs thread on here ? Some may not have read the pleasant prose of Mike Cresswell from the Yahoo group, in a review of the Glasgow gig a fortnight ago, published on http://www.hmhb.co.uk. I’m normally suspicious of those who lurk on the fringes trying to take the gig semi-seriously, but Mike clearly has a mighty gadget, or an even mightier memory, and the results are impressive. Either way, I’ll just quote him about this track and leave you to find his full review elsewhere:
“That just leaves me with the ubiquitous “Twenty Four Hour Garage People”, which Nigel introduced as “a song about reversing into a car boot sale and accidentally flogging your engine”. I have no idea if this song appeals to the non-Biscuit lover, although frankly my dear, I couldn’t really give one. To me it is essential Blackwell; an ever-evolving smorgasbord of delight, subtly metamorphosing with the gentle tinkering that lends itself to Nigel’s rampant imagination. Let me update you with current developments. Pringles are, of course, 94 pence. As opposed to; “That’ll be 79 pence please sir, bit of a recession on, so we’ve reduced the price. Anything else you want, just ask.” This is after having to go to the other side of the shop through a heavy door, to which our character can’t find the key to. “But it’s OK, I’ll wait.”
Our Mate, Chief, Pal, Ace, Captain (over-50), Boss and Bud is getting annoyed. Down goes the Isaac Asimov. Mind you, this is only concealing a word search; “Friend, non-existent, etc.” He hasn’t graduated to Sudoku yet. He has to put his iPod down, but it’s loud because he is partly deaf, due to the fact that he’s into Moto GP and he goes to all the meetings. The iPod is on shuffle and all you hear is “Rory Gallagher, Edgar Winter Band, Edgar WB, Rory G, RG, EWG, etc.” The sign behind him says that; “You don’t have to like Bob Seger to work here, but you probably do.” Finally, he has a packet of Fruit Polos. “Who the frick over 50 eats Fruit Polos?” “
Jun 3rd, 2009
Jan
The guitar on those last two lines in the studio version of this is one of the most beautiful things I have ever heard, and I don’t consider myself impoverished as far as listening experiences go. Am I right, o my fraternal cadre of experts, am I right? Is it an open tuning and played along the frets? Luscious.
Jun 3rd, 2009
Charles Exford
Last Thursday night at the actual petrol station that inspired this classic.
Nobody hurt.
Report purporting to be from the mum of the lad whose scooter went up, writing on a local news forum, suggests that the quality of staff behind the metal tray thingy may not have improved :
“I am the Mum of the scooterist whose Vespa went on fire. He is only 16 and a member of the ‘Shed of Shame’ Scooter Club. He filled up without spilling petrol. Engineers think that a static spark from his clothing lit petrol vapours around the pump (apparently very common). As you can see on the CCTV he tries to move the scooter away from the pump but the flames are too much so he places, not drops, it on the floor. He ran to the side of the building to phone the fire brigade. A customer, ‘John Harvey’, was also on the phone to the emergency services …when the Shell cashier asked him what the phone number for the fire brigade was!
“Personally I am very proud of my son. He was praised by the Fire Brigade and police for his reaction and told to have done anything different could have resulted in his death. I have written to the Echo so they can straighten the facts of the story.
“And yes I agree, the Fire Brigade were fantastic!”
Mar 7th, 2010
Charles Exford
As a post-script to the above, a photo taken from the website of the Prenton scooter club being referred to. Brighton was too far for their bank holiday outing, and it seems they changed their mind about the zoo when they saw the prices.
Mar 7th, 2010
s.g.d A Shropshire Lad
this was the version performed at Brampton festival 22/7/2006
“Hal-an-tow
Jolly rumbelow
We was up long before the day-O
to welcome in the summer,
to welcome in the May-O.
the Summer is a coming in
and Winter’s gone away-o”
So I fancy I’ll open a stationer’s
Stock quaint notepads for weekend Pagans
While you were out at The Rollright Stones
I came and set fire to your shed
‘Cos you probably work at an all-night garage
You probably work at an all-night garage
You probably work at an all-night garage
With Talk Radio on
You curse my soul ‘cos I don’t want petrol
You curse my soul when I don’t want petrol
I only came down for a tube of Pringles
…Sour Cream and Chives
And because you gotta get up off your big fat arse to go and get my crisps you start to develop a scowl I don’t own a car I don’t want petrol just want some crisps and you walk the 300 yards what feels like to you 300yards to go and get my crisps and you come back with them and you toss them arrogantly into that metal tray device that separates us and you say: “One pound four”, as opposed to: “That’ll be eighty seven pence please, sir thank you do come again”.He’s a tough nut behind his Tuf-plex glass Well this is done of course to annoy me but has the opposite effect of course of amusing me no end, and all of a sudden I’ve got a lot of other things I need to buy and all night in which to buy them…
“I’ll have two Scotch eggs and a jar of Marmite,
Two Scotch eggs and a jar of Marmite
Two Scotch eggs and a jar of Marmite
…what sandwiches have you got?” …Chief!
Well now he’s getting really annoyed and his face is going the same shade as his red issue Shell Pringle v-neck sweater and there’s a queue forming behind me and I can just here his I-pod in the background which he has had to take off and place on the side to deal with me and I can hear he’s got it on shuffle and you can just about hear the faint sound
“Like a bird on the wire, like a drunk man midnight choir, I have tried in my way to be free.”
“There stands the glass that will ease all my pain
That will settle my brain it’s my first one today”
“jump up turn around go and get his Pringles
jump up turn around get his scotch eggs
jump up turn around gotta get his Pringles
jump up turn around and get his scotch eggs
Oh Lord I wish I didn’t work here
Oh Lord I wish I was dead
Oh Lord I wish I didn’t work here
Oh Lord I wish I was dead”
“West is Mike and Susie
West is Mike and Susie ”
And he starts to sound like Leadbelly at the Depot
“We got ham, we’ve got cheese, we’ve got chicken,we got old boost beef,we got old roast beef
and we got tuna-sweetcorn; tuna-sweetcorn…”
“I’ll have ten Kit-Kats and a motoring atlas
Ten Kit-Kats and a motoring atlas
And a blues CD on the Hallmark label
–’cos that’s sure to be good”
Oh he went to play golf on a Sunday morn’ just a half a mile from town
His head was found on the driving range and his body has never been found
Mar 23rd, 2010
TWO FAT FEET
Would it be pedantic to point out that Pringles have never actually been available in Sour Cream & Chives flavour?
Apr 5th, 2011
Toffo
Yes
Apr 5th, 2011
Vendor of Quack Nostrums
It appears that some people cannot tell the difference between a chive and an onion.
However, strictly speaking, a chive is an onion so where does that leave us?
Apr 5th, 2011
TWO FAT FEET
Pedantic?
Besides it doesn’t say that on the tube and I wouldn’t expect a 24-hour garage person to be aware of that.
Apr 5th, 2011
John Burscough
Surely not a confusion with the dip?
Apr 5th, 2011
John Burscough
And if we want to be retrospectively pedantic (ooh let’s), following a landmark VAT ruling in the High Court in 2008 Pringles weren’t crisps either, until the decision was overturned in 2009.
(Incidentally, the company was sold yesterday by Procter & Gamble, the price of Pringles now standing at $2.35 billion.)
Apr 6th, 2011
John Anderson
As opposed to “that’ll be $2.35 billion please sir.”
Apr 6th, 2011
Nathan R.
Two things:
1.) At the last Manchester gig (Dec 17th, 2011), Blackwell acknowledged that Sour Cream and Chive was never a flavour, and although that was what he initially ordered, he went on to say, ‘Sour cream and onion, actually; there is no Sour Cream and Chive, so there you go. That’s research for you.’ Has Nigel been scouring these very pages?
2.) It’s Lead Belly!
Jan 18th, 2012
John Burscough
The man himself spelled it Lead Belly (like Meat Loaf) but, according to Wikipedia, many releases list him as Leadbelly. Google hits favour Leadbelly 4:1.
Jan 18th, 2012
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