The Half Man Half Biscuit Lyrics Project

Busking this at Embankment Tube tomorrow

162 pop songs picked over by pedants (in 2,968 comments!)

They can preach naked from the waist downwards

With the Peel/BBC Sessions material being so readily available online nowadays, it’s the EP-only obscurities which are probably the least well-known HMHB songs. Ecclesiastical Perks can be obtained – expensively – online if it somehow passed you by! There are a couple of guesses towards the end, which some of you might have thoughts on. Thanks to Sanchez and Sarah

See lyrics to Ecclesiastical Perks

9 Letters Sent:
  1. celery

    Possibly
    ‘I’m gonna bottle up my love’ instead of ‘I want a bottle of my love’
    and
    ‘Near Fakenham’ (?) instead of ‘Dear Fake Nun’.

  2. Both seem likely, I’d say. Any seconders?

  3. Dave F.

    I concure with Celery’s first point.

    But not sure of the second.
    I can well imagine a fake nun with jokes breasts driving around without seat belts attached.

    It’s something that the likes of Gascoigne would have done in the autumn of ’96.

    Fierce Panda – another record label. How many is that now?

  4. Agree with Celery’s first point as well, the following line doesn’t really make sense if it’s ‘I want a bottle of my love’.

  5. dirk the purist

    I vote for Fakenham – another racecourse name check and also missed from the map

  6. John Anderson

    I’ve never imagined it to be anything other than “bottle up my love” which seems to be a wonderful parody on those “Christians can still be trendy” songs you occasionally hear on Songs of Praise (not that I watch it, you understand).

    The Fake Nun/Fakenham bit is harder to define. I reckon it could be “Near Fakenham/Fake breasts on.” My mate’s Mum lives in Fakenham and it doesn’t appear to be the kind of place where fake breasts would be encouraged, hence the irony.

  7. That’s enough from the pro-Fakenham lobby to sway me. I’m getting worried by the prevalence of Naafolk references over Suffolk ones, but at least Town (Brazil, Zondervan) hold sway over the Canaries.

  8. NIck Ink

    Love this song, hilarious.

    nothing else to add, except a burning need to pop up now and again and say thanks for this site.

  9. Godsy

    I hear “I wanna bottle up my love”, which I think makes more sense anyway. This orgasmic Christianity would be an ongoing emotion rather than a future action. Also come on Norfolk references!

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