Paradise Lost (You’re The Reason Why) is one of the best HMHB song titles ever, and the lyrics ain’t bad either. Here it’s going to cause a little discussion because of one word, I suspect: six different people sent in the lyrics to the song, resulting in five different suggestions – doll, goal, gall, Gaul and Gaulle. Have fun. Thanks to Simon, Sketch, gNick, John A, EskimoEric and Sarah.
See lyrics to Paradise Lost (You’re The Reason Why)
Charles Exford
Nice one chaps.
But this time I quibble over the capital letter on ‘Lost’. Surely it’s a play on words with Milton’s title, with Paradise as a footy team, and ‘lost’ being what they did, rather than actually quoting Milton’s title ?
14 May 2009
Fredorrarci
I’m probably incorrect on this, so I present for the sake of eliminating it from enquiries: I’d heard it as “Is it you who’s too stoned for the motorway cone”, as in someone who’s too wasted even to indulge in the hilarious madcap bit of highway thievery beloved of twats everywhere.
Also, is it “Now regain it for me, Rodney”?
14 May 2009
Chris The Siteowner
More than one person has suggested “too stoned”, which is how I’d heard it. But thinking about it, there seems to be a list going on here (“motorway cone, Barry Venison and Davina McCall”) and “too stoned for Barry Venison” doesn’t seem quite right. But I’m open to offers, as I am with “Now”…
14 May 2009
Fredorrarci
That makes sense alright, otherwise “Barry Venison and Davina McCall” would be a bit of a non sequitur.
Whatever happened to Barry Venison, anyway?
14 May 2009
Tostare
Fredorrarci – being too stoned to steal motorway cones seems wrong, it’s the sort of thing only stoned students would do surely?
“to stone” seems like the most likely explanation to me since it fits with venison, mcall etc.
re the Laboratoire Garnier line – i thought it was
“And the Laboratoire Garnier goal”
which i imagined to be a reference to those giant led screens they have in football stadiums. I thought that maybe Nigel had seen one where LG were the sponsors of the match, and so put their logo on the ‘goal’ animation that comes up when someone scores. Mind you i don’t go to football matches so this might just be a complete flight of fancy on my part.
15 May 2009
Charles Exford
Its’s ‘to stone’ : NB occasionaly goes for half-rhymes when it’s funny, but mostly he seems to love yer actual good old-fashioned full rhyme, with the more internal rhyme the better. Stone-cone, McCall, Gaul, that sort of thing.
‘To blame’ wouldn’t rhyme (nor would ‘goal’). Anyway, retribution in the songs often takes projectile form: flying bricks, figs, and in this case the miscreant is to be stoned for inventing the motorway cone and deciding that putting certain people on telly is a good idea. Suitably biblical.
He’s obsessed with eschatology and retribution in so many songs: divine retribution in everything from Dickie Davies Eyes to Evening of Swing to Problem Chimp to Bottlneck, social retribution in a good many ‘list of tw*ts’ songs like Breaking News and this one.
Barry Venison ? In 2004, he emigrated to Redondo Beach, California, where he is apparently enjoying life as a property developer in Orange County, and has taken on the stereotypical “California Lifestyle.” According to one reporter who met him recently, “He looks more like 23 than 43, and has a deep brown tan and is covered in tattoos. He’s been teetotal for about five years, and gets up at 6am every day and does yoga. Then he waxes up his surfboard and heads out to catch some waves.” He also has other business interests, and has recently worked the US Tennis Association summer tour for Hawk-Eye Innovations, which is a ball-tracking technology that essentially tells if the ball is in or out of play.
Barry Venison may not have been included in the official lfc.tv list of “100 Players Who Shook The Kop”, but he did make it onto The Liverpool Way’s “10 Players Who Shook The Kop With Laughter.”
(Neil – that was the edited version).
15 May 2009
Neil G
Fascinating!
16 May 2009
Dave F.
Hi
I’m going with Mr. Exford on the lower case L.
Also ‘Ah regain…’
I think it is the verb ‘to stone’ but that seems to make ‘for’ redundant?
16 May 2009
Fredorrarci
Somehow, it’s utterly unsurprising that Venison has gone down that road.
Tostare: My thinking was that they’d be stoned enough to conceive the plan, but too stoned to execute it properly. It probably doesn’t stand up to scrutiny, which is one reason I was wrong.
Dave F: I don’t think ‘for’ is redundant. Imagine replacing “stone” with “blame” in “Is it you who’s to stone for the motorway cone…”
While I’m here: this song contains one of the best anti-solos ever, up there with ‘Boredom’ and ‘Canyons of Your Mind’.
21 May 2009
Charles Exford
I’m sure it’s ‘you foisted’, Past Simple. There is a precedent – another song a while back where you’d inserted an extra “ve”, getting carried away after a couple of the preceding verbs had been in Present Perfect, but I can’t remember which song now – you corrected it anyway.
I once foisted a book on him, but fortunately it was well after this song came out and anyway I’d already read it. So I think I get away with that one.
Having raised the goalkeepers’ apostrophe in another place, I suppose I should give my view. Many amateur teams seem to have a spare set of gloves in the kitbag for use either by the regular goalie, the emergency goalie, the rotating goalie, the ringer from The Plough, etc… . but they are thought of as the gloves of the goalkeeper, singular, of the team. Of the role. Not really of the person. The tossing of the gloves by the manager/captain is often in my experience the first dread moment when the allocation of the role is done.
A case can be made for all three possibilities, I agree Chris. But in the spirit of Milton, this is likely to have been a one-off game between good and evil, with the destiny of mankind at stake, and only one goalkeeper responsible for the ultimate damnation of the human soul, and thereby of the appearance of motorway cones, Davina, and other sins.
So I do believe that “goalkeeper’s” does the job slightly better.
Not that I give as much of a toss as I do about ‘lost’ (capitals in the title, lower case in the text please).
27 May 2009
Chris The Siteowner
I’m tossing in the towel here, life’s too short.
27 May 2009
Charles Exford
Very gracious of you. A simple apostrophe causing you, and us all, to ponder our own mortality. Surely Blackwell and Milton would be equally proud.
27 May 2009
Chris H
Sorry to ressurect this one but I originally thought it was
‘And the Laboratoire Garnier gall’ in recognition of the sometimes unblievable claims made by said company about the qualities of their products. On a closer listen just now it seems sound like ‘at the’ but also could be ‘et le/la’ (not sure whether feminine or masculine) and thus conitnues the french language theme.
I might be wrong……..
28 May 2009
Jon
I’m convinced it’s
“And the Laboritoires Garnier gall”
Nothing else makes any sense
19 July 2009
Tonto’s Expanding Waist Band
As Frank Zappa said once, ‘The crux of the Biscuit is the apostrophe’… Apart from that, love the off-kilter-or-nothing guitar solo!
15 August 2009
Acidic Regulator
‘oh regain it for me rodney’ rather than ‘ah’? Like a maiden breathlessly entreating her swain (possibly in Capri)?
26 May 2012
ACIDIC REGULATOR
Having regard to where the avatar I’ve displaced was allegedly in, comments, please, on the effect of replacing the ‘a’ in “Twatone” with ‘o’. I reserve judgment.
3 August 2012
Chigley Skin
@Mike, great observation (though it took me a minute or so to get my head around) – but surely Nigel would never want the target of his ire suddenly becoming “irie”, least of all through the medium of a personalised reg plate.
Mike in Cov knows, don’t arguuuuuuuue…
3 August 2012
John Burscough
Wasn’t Twatone a Scottish ska label?
3 August 2012
ACIDIC REGULATOR
I suspect it’s merely one of those just-fancy-that observations without any significance. I can’t really see NB dissing Two Tone. The Specials took on similar subject-matter to his, and The Boiler is one of the most harrowing songs ever recorded.
I can’t misspell “twatone” in a way that would be a valid vehicle registration, but don’t think that that’s significant either. However, the spelling-out technique regrettably reminded me of D-I-V-O-R-C-E by Tammy Wynette and by Billy Connolly. To maintain the tone of this site, I am not posting links.
Googling “twatone” yielded 100K+ hits, mainly it would seem as usernames. The first one I found was recommending their video of something by The Carpenters, and the second had taken a photo of himself every day for the last six years. I stopped there, human kind cannot bear very much surreality.
3 August 2012
ACIDIC REGULATOR
@John – of course they were! famous for bands such as The Tennent’s Specials, Midsummer Madness and The Scottish Beat.
3 August 2012