29 Oct 2007
While St Peter investigates the inevitable asterisk
Thanks to Sanchez from the genius which is pointlesswasteoftime.com for these lyrics from the odd but strangely compelling Achtung Bono track Surging Out Of Convalescence. I made a couple of small amendments and I think it’s spot-on now.
See lyrics of Surging Out Of Convalescence
19 Letters Sent:
Dennis
Genius. Thanks so much for these. I’ve heard the song 50+ times and never knew the first verse was about darts in soap operas! Good luck with the project!
Dennis
Dec 1st, 2007
quality janitor
Lol. When the album first came out, my mate third rate les and I were singing “dogs in soap operas, so wrong” (wellards, willie and roly6 – need I say more?)
Mar 22nd, 2008
Bill Stow
Line 1 of the final verse – the magazine is ‘Horse and Hound’
No ‘s’
Noel Noel
Noel Noel
That is the name of that b******d Cantwell
as we used to sing on the terraces
regards
Bill
Feb 6th, 2009
Chris The Siteowner
The magazine is indeed Horse and Hound. But that ain’t what’s in the song…
Feb 7th, 2009
nick h
A regular in my ‘top 5′ this one.
Sounds distinctly like ‘Try in vain’.
Jun 2nd, 2009
Daryl
I hear
‘I’ll doubtless have to wait’
instead of
‘I will doubtless have to wait’
Jun 20th, 2009
Jon
3rd verse has:
Let’s face it, what’re they going to do?
I’m sure ther is a ‘Well’ in front:
Well let’s face it…………
Sep 21st, 2009
Mark
Always thought it was “they don’t know their board” which makes sense?
Apr 7th, 2010
dagenham dave
Mark – I agree, that’s what I’ve always heard.
Apr 7th, 2010
Chris The Siteowner
Hmm, anyone else?
Apr 7th, 2010
Neil G
‘Therefore’, to my ears, and it makes more sense.
Apr 8th, 2010
John Anderson
Another vote for “therefore”. It’s simply a conjunction.
Apr 8th, 2010
Third rate Les
Therefore for me, no question. It goes with the “I propose” in a faintly overblown style for comic effect.
One of my absolute all-time favourites. I love the contrast between the drama of the music and the sheer daftness of the lyrics as it builds up at the end, and the hyperactive kid line makes me laugh every time – a line that sums up so much in such a briefly dismissive way (a bit like the “James Dean/Marilyn Monroe” one, I always think).
Apr 8th, 2010
Charles Exford
Like Les, I’m very fond of this song. I love the way it starts jaunty, then goes slow and hesitant, “therefore …I propose ….no ” but gradually gains strength, accelerating into a joyous-yet-angry romp of tune. It’s as if the first slow moan about darts in soap operas has been made propped up on pillows watching the telly after being poorly, but it’s a definite sign that he’s on the mend, and he’s soon surging out of convalescence with a typically Blackwellian rant, made up of a collage of diverse images, mostly of them wonderfully silly but some slightly serious, set to an accelerating romp of a tune.
And of course there are literary quotes too. First the biblical-sounding language of iron entering people’s souls, a common saying over many centuries, but here it is in Thomas Hardy, writing about “Jude the Obscure”, in his letters, V2, 93:
“This tragedy is addressed to those whose souls the iron has entered, and entered deeply, at some point in their lives.”
But in the previous line, we’re in Aldeburgh on the Suffolk Coast, with George Crabbe (born 1754) writing hard-hitting rhymes about his local poorhouse:
“There children dwell who know no parents’ care;
Parents, who know no children’s love, dwell there!
Heart-broken matrons on their joyless bed,
Forsaken wives, and mothers never wed;
Dejected widows with unheeded tears,
And crippled age with more than childhood fears.”
From “The Village” (1783) by George Crabbe. A poem oft-quoted about C18 and C19 poorhouses.
[As well as Crabbe and Roy Keane, who walks his dog on the beach at Aldeburgh (as ITFC’s very own Chris Rand will doubtless attest), other notable residents of this famous historical town have included Benjamin Britten (who based “Peter Grimes” on Crabbe’s lyrics) ... and M.R. James, another favourite author of NB57. Small world.]
Apr 9th, 2010
Vendor of Quack Nostrums
Sorry to bring this up again but pedantry should not be defeated by an initial rebuttal. I’ve listened to 45-50 seconds in an unreasonable amount of times and it is a definite ‘be’ sound after ‘there’, which is actually ‘their’ not ‘there’.
It is definitely ‘I know that they don’t know their board. I propose….’ It makes much more sense than ‘ I know that they don’t know, therefore I propose…..’. If it was the latter then, strictly speaking, the sentence needs a demonstrative pronoun. It should be ‘ I know that they don’t know that, therefore I propose…..’ which it obviously isn’t.
However, even allowing for incorrect usage I will still argue for ‘I know that they don’t know their board’, on the grounds that it is a really well crafted line. ‘He knows his board’ was a comment muttered with grudging respect during my short lived career on a pub darts team in the mid 80s. Never unfortunately delivered in my direction. A darts player who ‘knows his board’ knows all of his ‘outs’ (eg. 101 can be achieved with a checkout of Triple 17 and Bull). It therefore fits the theme of the verse which is that in Soap Opera darts ‘cheers are raised for the bull’ for no reason other than the participant has managed to hit the exact centre of the board, rather than realising that there might be some significance in that event in terms of the game. In other words he doesn’t know his board as he hasn’t realised that the bull is in fact ‘a double and an out’. The spectators are merely cheering the fact that he has hit the smallest target on the board.
Pedants, it’s over to you!
Sep 26th, 2010
Germ
Totally agree that it’s “they don’t know their board”,it’s what I sing!
Sep 26th, 2010
Chris The Siteowner
Vendor: Thanks for pointing out (elsewhere) that I’d omitted to change the “board” line. But I just don’t hear it. If it was “board”, the song would then be missing a “therefore” before “I propose”, otherwise it really wouldn’t work. I will certainly admit defeat gracefully if anyone else agrees with “board”, of course, but what do others think? At the moment I’m definitely in a minority, it would appear.
Aug 8th, 2011
Charles Exford
Since this suggestion was proposed I have stood at the front countless times watching carefully, with an open mind natch* as NB57 formed the /f’/of therefore.
Beyond all reasonable doubt.
*I may well be deciding to embark upon a spurious campaign of unnecessary-but-entirely-harmless abbreviations, just to see who I can irk.
Aug 8th, 2011
Cardinal
Re posts 3 & 4 above– the extra-s debate is particularly interesting, in light of the remonstration against such in “Shit Arm, Bad Tattoo”, one song previous…
Oct 13th, 2011
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